Are you stuck and overwhelmed in your job search?

November 8, 2013 | Author: Arleen Bradley
Are you stuck in your job search or find it overwhelming?

Are you stuck in your job search or find it overwhelming?

I have seen it so many times.  People want to move on but can’t.  They feel stuck and overwhelmed.  They are sort of making the right motions to getting a job, but their hearts just aren’t in it.  Maybe this is where you are.  And you probably don’t understand why you feel the way you do.  You want and need a job, but you have many excuses for not fully embracing an all-out job search.  You may find reasons not to network, to not apply for jobs, feel your resume isn’t good enough or don’t know exactly what you want to do.

It’s understandable if you were employed for a long time at your former employer, and  you were separated from the company involuntarily.  It is normal and natural to feel like this under these circumstances. 

You were once the newbie, but that was so long ago, you have forgotten that you quickly became part of the team.  You grew into your position over the years.  New duties were added gradually as were new technologies.   Perhaps you were given training when things changed, and you were allowed time to get used to them. 

During your unemployment, your confidence and esteem has taken a beating.  Not hearing anything after you send a résumé; not getting the job after you “aced” the interview, and the emotional roller coaster of anticipation and rejection have played a part in the deterioration of your self-worth.  Since you haven’t used your job related skills lately, you suspect they are either weak or gone.  You could also believe that you’re not up-to-date with the technology or changes in the field. 

The uncertainty of the job market offers you another challenge.  You know people who have gotten jobs that didn’t last long and/or were disasters from the get go.  I know many people who obtained jobs only to be laid off  again.  People have told me of their experiences in new jobs where there high expectations, little training, unreasonable hours, low pay, and other employees were difficult to work with.

Fears of being the newbie, your skills are lacking, and losing your job again are typical.  While you are eager for financial security, the fears are holding you back.   You probably can’t express your feelings and that this article has opened your eyes to what you are actually experiencing.  But realize you are not alone.  While not everyone goes through this, there are many people feeling the same as you. 

There are ways to overcome these feelings.  Tomorrow I will share 10 ways to regain your confidence and conquer the fears that are holding you back.  You are better than you think you are and are capable of doing whatever you set your mind to.  I believe in you, and so will you.

 

 

How can I help you in your job search?

Image:  Freedigitalphotos.net  David Castillo Dominici

Posted in Job Loss Emotions | 1 Comment

3 Things Job Searchers Can From the World Series

October 31, 2013 | Author: Arleen Bradley

 

Believe and you will do you what need to achieve.

Believe, and you will do you what need to achieve.

I have to admit that I am glad the Red Sox won the 2013 World Series.  It has been a tough here in Greater Boston since the Boston Marathon.   Boston is a sports town.  Sports teach many lessons.  Win or lose, there is something to be gained for the event.   Fortunately, for job searchers in Red Sox Nation the lesson was learned with a win.

Never give up—anything can happen.  No matter how hard it is, how frustrated you are, and what other people say, keep on trying.  If the Red Sox can go from worst to first, you can achieve your goals.  You can do it if you believe you can.  Once you stop believing, your luck will start running out.  It takes hard work and determination, but it can be done.   If things are going the way you want, look at what you are doing and make necessary adjustments. 

You don’t have to go it alone—the Red Sox won as a team.  Everyone helped win.  No one person did it alone.  It took everyone from the infield, outfield, pitchers, catchers, coaches, managers, medical staff, and, yes, even the guy who washed the uniforms after every game.  You don’t have to go it alone either.   You can receive help from others to push you out of your comfort zone to accomplish what you never thought you could.  Allow the encouragement from your pep squad, the support you get will help you get over the rough times. 

Practice, practice, practice—no matter how skilled you think you are, you can always benefit with more practice.  Players took batting practice, pitcher pitched; they all threw and caught balls even though they are major league ball players.  The players learned these fundamentals in little league but still they practice.  It builds confidence.  The more you practice answering interview questions, the better you will be at answering them.  It is especially true with activities you are uncomfortable with.  For you, it might be networking, or making cold calls, or follow up calls.  Whatever you shy away from, practice makes it easier.

In addition to the three lessons above, the win by the Red Sox gave job searchers in Red Sox Nation a fantastic gift.  The players gave them something to be happy about.  They gave them a brief respite from the stress and anxieties.  From the win to the rolling rally on Saturday morning, people are celebrating the win with smiles, high fives, and reliving moments of the game.  They are celebrating the win with chants of “we won!”  Although they sat watching the game with family and friends, they have embraced the victory as their own.  A win is a win.  It is something to enjoy and be happy about.  That is the best part of the win for the job searchers in Red Sox Nation.

 

How can I help you in your job search?

Posted in Lesson learned from a World Series Win | 2 Comments

Interview Lessons Learned from Halloween.

October 30, 2013 | Author: Arleen Bradley
You won't get the job just by showing up dressed up.

You won’t get the job just by showing up dressed up.

Halloween is almost here.  Just ask the kids who have their costumes ready and can taste the candy.  They have prepared for a long time.  I remember as a kid, the summer would be spent deciding how I would dress for the big day.  But as a career coach, I think about how trick or treating can teach job searchers about interviewing.

Halloween means costumes, getting candy for just showing up and remembering to say thank you.  Interviewing means interview suit, getting the candy and remembering to say thank you. 

1-      Costumes—you don’t wear your Halloween costume every day, and you don’t dress as your best professional self every day.  Just as you spent a long time finding the perfect costume, you must find the perfect interview clothes.  You want to be dressed to appropriately express your interest in the job.  You don’t want to dress to casually or overly formal.  The right balance for you is determined by the company, the job and your personality.  It is common knowledge in human resources that the day of the interview is the best dressed they will ever see you. 

 2-      It isn’t about you getting the candy–unlike Halloween, you don’t get the candy for just showing up and ringing the doorbell or everyone getting the candy.  It is about showing up ready to show the company how you are the best candidate for the job.  You must show them you understand their need and how you can fill it.  Only one person will be the job, not everyone who applies or is interviewed.  There is only one job, and it is going to the best.  Preparation and practice are what you need to do in advance to impress the company.

 3-      Remember to say thank you-just as you said thank you after someone dropped a candy bar in your bag, you must remember your manners and say thank you after the interview.  Why?  Because it is your opportunity to show the company your good manners.  Good manners are only a small portion of the thank you note.  It is your way of following up to give them a gentle reminder who you are and what you can do for them. 

While waiting for ghosts, witches, hobos and princesses to show up at your door, prepare and practice some basic interview questions.  The fundamental questions such as, what is your biggest weakness; what is your greatest strength; why should we hire you; and tell me about yourself. 

How can I help you in your job search?

Posted in Interview tricks, Interviews | Leave a Comment

How Will You Thank the People Who Have Helped You?

October 28, 2013 | Author: Arleen Bradley

 

Giving back is a great way to thank people for all the support you have recieved.

Giving back is a great way to thank people for all the support you have recieved.

What will be the best part of having a job after being unemployed for a long time?  Your answer is unique to you.  And what will you do for others when you have a job?

I would like to tell you a story of a client of mine.  The story is about his happy ending.  But to understand the ending you have to know some background information.  Otherwise, the story won’t mean much. 

My client, John and Mary, (not their real names) were living out-of-state.  They had a happy life.  Both worked in jobs they enjoyed.  They owned a condo that was just perfect for them.  And enjoyed the company of good friends.  Then the unthinkable happened.  One by one they lost their jobs and then the condo.  With nothing else to do, they moved back home to her parents.

Needless to say, living in her old bedroom with a cat and a dog wasn’t working for them very well.  It became necessary for them to find another place to live.  Which thankfully they did, however, their new accommodations started out perfect but went sour after a while.  The people they lived with liked having them, however,  John and Mary found living with people who have emotional issues trying.  You could say it was a roller coaster.

While their housing situation has its’ ups and downs, their careers weren’t much better.  Both were looking for work.  But John and Mary couldn’t seem to have jobs at the same time.  John would get a job.  Mary would continue to look.  When Mary found a job, John would get laid off.  John would get a job, Mary would get laid off.  It was the norm for them. 

They both looked forward to the time when they would each have a job and would be able to get their own home.  And replace the cars that were getting tired.  They weren’t happy.  But they had each other. 

Finally, they got a break.  They had an opportunity to move to another state.  John’s mother had a condo that she didn’t want to sell but was moving and didn’t want to leave it empty.  It was a perfect solution for John and Mary.  They moved, John found a great job and Mary is able to pursue free-lance work.  They have their things out of storage and are living with each other only.  No other relatives. 

But the story doesn’t end here.  Recently, while at a gas station, John saw a teenage girl having trouble paying for her gas.  The young woman was quite upset as she was a long way from home.  John quietly gave her $20 to put gas in her car.  The young woman, overwhelmed with gratitude, promised to pay them back.  Instead, John just told her to pay it forward.  He had been in similar predicaments in the past, and he felt wonderful to help someone who truly needed it.

It was his way of paying back all the people who had been there for him and Mary.  Sometimes you can’t back someone back for what they do for you, but you can pay it forward.  How will you pay back all the people who are helping you in your job search? 

 

How can I help you in your job search?

Image:  freedigitalphotos.net  Stuart Miles

Posted in Appreciation for job search help | 4 Comments

Communicating for Job Search Success

October 21, 2013 | Author: Arleen Bradley
Steepling = confidence or does it. Depends where you hand are. Away from the face shows confidence but in front of the mouth shows nervousness.

Steepling = confidence or does it.  Depends where you hands are. Away from the face shows confidence but in front of the mouth shows nervousness.

Communication is vital in your job search.  When I hear the word, I think of people talking.  But talking is only about 8% of communicating.  Another 40% is about the tone of voice.  Over 50% involves body language. 

Take the phrase, I’m sorry.  The words are very basic.  But I’m sure you have heard someone say they were sorry but not actually mean it.  It came out sounding like I’m soooorry.  It didn’t sound too convincing.  Add in the eye roll and hands on the hips and you know they aren’t sorry but someone is making them say it. 

Communication is a two-way street.  You talk and someone listens, then they talk, and you listen.  While listening you are watching and hearing the meaning behind the words.  However, you must not look at only one gesture and reach a conclusion.  The entire exchange must be looked at to understand the results.

As a job searcher, not only are the words you are saying but how you say it and your gestures show more about you than you realize.  The other person in the conversation can tell if you are lying, nervous, or confident.  Usually you are wondering what the interviewer is thinking about you.  But you need to read them to know what they are thinking.

In an interview,  the hiring manager is listening and watching you to decide you’re a fit for the position.  You are doing the same.  You are listening and watching to see if you want to work with this person and this company.    You have to be sure you can work with this person interviewing you.

Do you like what you are hearing and seeing?  Is the interviewer giving you accurate answers to you questions?  Are you sensing some doubt?

Keeping your eyes open is just as essential as listening intently.  Understanding how people communicate with their body will give you an edge when negotiating salary, benefits or anything else.  However, you must know what the different nuances of gestures mean.    In an upcoming post, I will explain those differences. 

How can I help you in your job search?

Freedigitalphotos.net   stockimages

Posted in body language for interviews | Leave a Comment